These files of his seem to be scattered in no particular order which makes retrieving the information found within the files an arduous task. More often than not, he gives up, but, on this day, he kept searching. As the words scrambled and cluttered on his tongue, I reminded him to take his time and that I wasn't going anywhere. Ryan finally found the school file and shared what happened in school with me. Then, exasperated by his efforts, he looked out the window and sighed, "I'm not very good with words".
I very quickly assured him that I think he is AWEsome with words. I reminded him how amazing his brain is and how quickly his amazing brain can find just the right words from just the right movie, television show, or Youtube video and make those words fit just the right conversation. I told Ryan that although my brain files seem to be more orderly and "words" seem to come more easily for me, my brain can barely remember what I ate for breakfast that morning let alone a just right, perfect script for a conversation.
We each our good with words, in our own unique way.
Ryan didn't look convinced. I wanted him to understand that even though he may have heard those words somewhere else, they are still HIS words and part of HIS communication and that he is indeed "good with words". So, I gave him some perfectly AWEsome examples.
Hey buddy, remember when....
We were driving around Grammy and Pappy's town looking at all the old Victorian Era mansions and I was "oohing and ahhhing" over the size and in your best Shrek voice you said, "Sure it's big enough, but, look at the location" and we all laughed until we cried (you included). Your words were so good that Mommy almost wrecked the car into one of those Victorian mansion's fences which wouldn't have decreased the value of the mansion since according to you (and Shrek) it's all about location, location, location.
He smiled. A little.
How about the time we were eating dinner and I asked you if you liked the cake I made for dessert and in your near perfect Cousin Eddie (Christmas Vacation) impersonation, you shouted, "This is goooo-oood", again finding just the right words at just the right time.
He smiled again. Bigger.
What about the time at the beach we couldn't decide where to eat dinner and we wondered what you were hungry for and suddenly Jim Carrey's Fire Marshall Bill appeared in the car with a "He's cooking fishsticks" and we knew just what you wanted to eat. Those were good words that made us all giggle.
He laughed. Quietly.
My favorite was when we saw a rainbow and Emma said, "water plus sun equals a rainbow" and you piped in "Rainbows are a result of refraction of moisture and light in the air" and you sounded just like your favorite cartoon character at the time, Gumball. Those words were so good Emma and I had no words (that never happens).
He laughed. Louder.
And I know you were too little to remember this, but, once when we were snuggling in your bed, you wrapped your arms around me, and your words were so good that they went straight from my ears to my heart, "I wish you were a human that could live a thousand years." They were your words and they were beautiful. You are good with words Ryan.
He grew silent. Again.
Worried, that I had not proved my point, I continued with more and more examples of times that he was good with words and how those words, those scripts, were his way of communicating and that my words are no better, no more effective, than his.
Ryan perked up. He sat up higher in his seat. Then suddenly it seemed as though his brain files had order. Ryan gave me this script and that script. He used this voice and that voice. He smiled. He laughed. He believed.
As we approached the house, knowing the ride and this conversation were quickly coming to an end, Ryan never said, "Thanks Mom, you are right, in my own way, I am good with words", but, he didn't need to because his smile and his Fire Marshall Bill voice as he opened the door and yelled, "let me tell you something" said it all.